


That Time Harmony Should Probably Just Have Listened To Nolar (but it wouldn't have been as much fun)

by vaguely_concerned



Series: Do I Dare Disturb the Universe 'verse [2]
Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Fluff and Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-12
Updated: 2016-07-12
Packaged: 2018-07-23 15:44:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7469478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vaguely_concerned/pseuds/vaguely_concerned
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set in the alternate timeline that was created towards the end of the story - John and Rodney are visiting Harmony’s castle, and she makes some startling discoveries.</p>
            </blockquote>





	That Time Harmony Should Probably Just Have Listened To Nolar (but it wouldn't have been as much fun)

**Author's Note:**

> A tag that I could have added but didn't: #maybe eventual accidental marriage. I love this alternate timeline; it's only joy and hijinks and no one dies tragically.

 

Most of the staff had all four days of Winter’s Peak off, and Harmony had to admit that she was enjoying the less formal structure of her days. The official palace meals, for example, were always delicious but could last for hours and usually involved at least three sets of cutlery and four sets of dignitaries. Sometimes it was just a whole lot more satisfying to sit down, eat some bread and cheese and then get _on_ with things.

She sat at the end of the long empty tables of the dining hall, her plate already cleaned and her chin resting in her palm. On the bench to her right Nolar hummed tunelessly to himself as he peeled some apples with an implausibly large knife. He gave every sign of wilfully ignoring Harmony’s restlessness as the minutes passed and no one arrived from the palace’s guest quarters. She had told them breakfast would be served at sunrise, had she not?

“Are they not going to rise soon?” Harmony said finally, itchy with impatience.

“Well, when they arrived last night the Colonel said something about it being early morning where they came from, so I suppose they’re a bit gate lagged.” Nolar wiped apple juice off his knife and started buttering a slice of bread, wearing his usual expression of stone-faced implacability, but his feet were casually crossed at the ankles and his broad shoulders sloped, loose and relaxed; he was in a good mood. “I’d let them be a while, if I were you.”

“But the sun is up and it is almost _lunch time_ ,” Harmony complained. “I want to get _some_ use out of the day.”

Nolar took a big bite of bread and shrugged. “Then why don’t you stop whining and get started on some of the books your tutor brought you last week.”

Harmony moaned and let her head fall onto her folded arms where they rested on the table. “Do not even mention that. What do _I_ care about the history of taxation laws?”

“If you’re to be a good queen, it’s about the first thing you’ve got to care about,” Nolar said. “Lots of monarchs who’ve fallen from grace over a poorly thought out tax policy. Stay away from people’s beer, that’s all I’ll tell you.”

“Yes, well, this is a holiday, all that can wait. Unless you believe that would incite an instant revolution,” she added icily.

“Shouldn’t think so,” he said peaceably, ignoring the way she was wriggling in her seat. It was not often the people from Atlantis visited, and she wanted to make the most of the next five days. First of all she wished for Doctor McKay to look at some Ancient objects Nolar had found in the mountains to the north. They had lit up at her touch, but she could not tell what they were meant to do, apart from some half-concocted theories. Surely John must have grossly over-exaggerated how tired they were last night; they had seemed just fine to her. There had been nothing wrong with Rodney’s appetite, for one.

And she wanted to show them everything that had changed since they were here last - the experimental new vineyards to the south, the spectacular fireworks the alchemists were working on, the shards of dragon eggs the scouts had brought back, her new fan that could give people powerful electric shocks, the new tapestries and portraits and… and… she wanted to share it all with somebody, her whole kingdom through other eyes.  

It had been so long since she got to spend time with anyone besides Nolar who did not in some way treat her company as an opportunity to appeal to a queen. Whatever character flaws you could accuse Rodney of having, being too courteous was not one of them.

She stood up. “It has been long enough. I shall go and make sure my guests are well-cared for.”

“Your Highness,” Nolar said wearily, “I’m not sure the ambassadors would appreciate - ”

“Remind me, Nolar, what is your last name?” Harmony asked, as sweet as she could make it.

“...Lumsbred.”

“And what is _my_ last name?”

Nolar sighed. “You don’t have one.”

“Oh yes, that is right. Why is that again?”

“Because you’re the queen, Your Highness.”

“And whose palace is this?”

“The queen’s.”

“Ah, yes, it is all coming back to me. My palace. I go where I please.”

“‘Course you do,” he said, and one corner of his mouth quirked up almost imperceptibly in what, for him, was a grin. “Who am I to argue with someone who just turned sixteen. Should’ve known better. Hey, by the way,” he added as she walked towards the doors. “Guess what?”

She paused. “What?”

“I’m getting another grandchild soon. My eldest, she’s having her second any day now.”

“Ah!” Harmony nodded rigorously. “That is good news indeed. I will insist on performing the naming ceremony myself, of course.”

“All these little people turning up in my house and I’m already running out of names.” Nolar shook his head and looked down into his beer mug.

“Start naming them after virtues,” she advised. “Easy to come up with. Like… Charity, or Prudence, or Grace, or… Fortitude, I suppose, if it is a boy.”

“I’m not calling the poor kid ‘Fortitude’, Your Highness. And no grandchild of mine is ever going to live up to ‘Prudence’, I should think. ‘Charity’ is good, though. The wife would like that.” He moved his mouth around a little, as if tasting the names. “Hm. ‘Faith’, maybe. That’s nice. Ends right on the tip of your tongue.”

“See? Much easier.”

“Never doubted you, Your Majesty,” Nolar said, giving a lazy salute with the hand still holding his knife. As always he looked out of place indoors, like an enormous bird of prey amicably agreeing to spend a few hours in the cage for the look of the thing. He must want to go back to the forests and the mountains, to the sky mirrored in a thousand lakes. And yet he stayed, when she asked him to. “Thank you for the help.”

“You only have to ask.”

 

\-------

 

The guest quarters where the people of Atlantis usually stayed were in the east wing of the castle, not too far from her own rooms, but since it was just John and Rodney this time only one room had been prepared. She had overseen it herself, tripping impatiently while Flora looked on with indulgent amusement. Her older sister was like that, watching from the sidelines and letting things run their course most of the time. Mardola had always said Flora was too yielding, too willing to give in when she should stand strong, too preoccupied with soft matters like trade and diplomacy and medicine.

Harmony liked to remind herself that Flora was not the one who was going to spend the remainder of her life inside a stone cell.

Since most of the servants had the day off, the hallways were all quiet and empty, the castle like a garment without anyone wearing it. When she knocked on the door of the guest quarters, it echoed hollowly down the corridor. No one answered.

“Hello?” she called, knocking again. “John? Doctor McKay?”

Hm. Maybe they were not in there anymore, though she could not think where they would go except to eat breakfast with her. Maybe they were still asleep and could not hear her - it _was_ a very heavy door. Thankfully she knew the layout of the castle very well, so she tested the next door over, which was unlocked and lead her up a short stairwell and to a new door. The door opened to the indoor balcony that ran all the way along two sides of the guest room. The handrail was held up by broad, solid wooden balusters and various wrought iron intricacies - some of the finer work in the castle in modern time. Her father had always liked this room, apparently, reserving it for his most well loved guests or visiting family members. She liked to uphold the tradition, even if she had never met him.

Something was amiss with the room, it was not like it had been when she had had it prepared. She furrowed her brow and tried to figure out what had changed.  The curtains were drawn from the windows, letting in the sweet gold of dawn light, and the green and sky blue tapestries were exactly where she’d had them placed. The bookcase stood untouched. The only thing marring the clean, open span of the floorboards were two heaps of clothes, haphazardly left by the side of the bed and...

Then she realized - the room was supposed to have two separate beds. She only saw one double bed in the middle of the room. Two bulky shapes were visible under the sheets.

Oh _well_. She almost marched right down there to give them a piece of her mind - of course she had known they shared a room, they always did when they stayed at the palace, but, well... it had not occurred to her that they would _share_ it quite so liberally. If nothing else she would not have bothered to make sure they were given quarters with two separate beds, had she known they would just push them together like that. It was not as though the hearth did not bring enough heat to the room that huddling together for warmth should be needed. She would have handed them more firewood personally, had she thought they were that delicate.

The shapes under the sheets were shifting, and she could make out the sound of lazy muttering and some muffled laughter. She leaned forward to get a better look, slightly puzzled.  

The sheets slid down enough to expose first John’s shoulders, and then more and more of his back. Rodney’s hand came up to stroke in the wake of the sheets, fingers trailing down along John’s spine. There was a low, moaning noise from down there as the bedframes creaked.

Oh. _Oh._

Harmony spun on her heel, her face caught in a rictus of belated horror. Keeping her eyes firmly on a bare spot on the wall she sunk down into cover behind a baluster, willing herself invisible or, at the very least, less incandescently blushing.

So this was why Nolar had urged her to wait. That bastard could have just _told_ her. She swore that if she did not respect him so much, she would have him demoted to royal cesspit cleaner.

She could still pick out faint sounds of conversation, sleep softened and lazy. She should probably try to make out what they were saying, she told herself. Maybe she would be able to find out when they were distracted enough for her to sneak away without being noticed. Maybe they were getting ready to get up and she had limited time. Maybe… and this was the kind of thought you had to think beneath the rest of it, out of sight and out of mind in case you were asked questions later...  it would be interesting.

She snuck a glance from behind the baluster.

Rodney’s broad hand was nestled against the curve of John’s lower back like he was protecting something precious, pale against John’s skin. It was such a gentle gesture, like cupping a sparrow between your palms to warm it; Harmony would never have thought that Rodney’s fingers, honed to stark technology, had such undemonstrative sweetness in them.

John ducked down, his mouth trailing over Rodney’s throat before sliding down to the side of his neck and out of Harmony’s sight. Rodney gave a small gasp, though, his hips bucking under John’s weight.

“Glad to see there’s one part of you that’s an early riser,” he said around a snigger, voice hoarse and sloppy as his hand fumbled over John’s back, shoulder, neck, clutched gently at his hair.

John sighed approvingly at that, bowing his head a little so Rodney’s fingers tightened in his hair. When he pulled back he laughed, morning raspy, pushing up on his elbows to look down at Rodney. His hair was even more of a mess than usual. “Now that’s cheap, even for you.”

Rodney grinned up at him, cheeks flushed, eyes all but twinkling. He stroked the backs of his fingers against John’s cheek, then flipped them over, easily enough that John must have gone along very willingly indeed. With his dark hair against the pillow and a big, beaming smile on his face John Sheppard looked… different.

“So… is it time for you to admit I was right about the whole vacation thing yet, McKay?”

Rodney let out a long-suffering sigh and pressed a kiss to John’s chest. “I suppose that sometimes your ideas are less horrendously misguided than usual,” he allowed, magnanimously.

“Aw shucks, Rodney, you always know what to say.”

“I know, I know, I’m just too generous, that’s always been my biggest problem.”

John snorted, his hand under the covers doing something that made Rodney give a sound that was halfway between a laugh and a squeak. “ _I’m_ always going to be your biggest problem, Rodney.”

Rodney sniggered and lowered his head to let his ear rest on John’s chest. “True.”

They lay there for long enough that Harmony started to speculate on how quickly she could dart over to the door, and if there was any chance they would not notice.

Then Rodney lifted his head and glanced speculatively out the windows. “What time is it, would you guess?”

“Does it matter? Vacation, Rodney. _Vacation_.”

“Just wondering what Her Highness’ reaction will be to us sleeping in.”

“‘We are not amused’,” John said, his reedy theatrical tone making it sound like a quote, although Harmony had never heard the phrase before.

“I think it says something about how cute you are that that didn’t immediately kill my boner,” Rodney said thoughtfully.

“I’m choosing to take that as a compliment.”

“As you should. Mhmmm.” He stretched like a cat in a beam of sunlight. “Little princess McSnootypants is doing pretty well for herself, though. Keeping the kingdom on track, closing in on the invention of the steam engine…”

“Just so long as she doesn’t push it too far,” John said, cupping the back of Rodney’s neck and looking up at the ceiling. “The last thing she needs is the wraith showing up on her doorstep and asking inconvenient questions about advanced Ancient nanotech and huge electricity bills.”

Rodney sniffed. “It’s not as though she’s alone. We’re keeping an eye on it too.”

“Yeah, you’re right.”John turned his head to press his lips against Rodney’s temple. Harmony swallowed, her chest feeling heavy with something.  

“This is nice,” Rodney sighed dreamily. “You were totally right, we should do this more often. Ouch.”

“Hm?”

“I’ve got beard burn on my thighs from last night. Look. All… pink. Did I ever tell you I have sensitive skin? Because I think I did.”

“Mhm, it’s coming back to me now. Want me to kiss it better?”

“...well, when you put it like that, maybe breakfast can wait a little.”

Taking advantage of their distraction, Harmony scurried back to the door, crouched to stay in cover behind the bannister. She ran down the stairs as quietly as she could manage, half-falling into the open corridor at the end. After hurriedly dusting off her clothes she looked around to see if there was anyone around and found that she was thankfully alone. With all the nonchalance she could muster she strode down the hallway, like she was on her way somewhere important and not just anywhere that would grant her plausible deniability. In the end she locked herself in an alchemist’s office and took some time to compose herself. She pressed her sweaty palms against her cheeks, as if she could push the blush down physically. Maybe if she pretended really hard, none of that would have happened. Or at least, not the part where she was there to accidentally spy on it.

For a while she diverted her mind with an oddity standing on the alchemist’s desk - a frame from which five metal spheres were suspended on the end of wires, for obscure reasons. For a while she observed how movement seemed to be transferred from the first sphere to the last almost immediately, as if by magic. It was a calming if confusing spectacle. When her thoughts had settled she leaned back against the desk and drew in a deep breath. A smile threatened the borders of her lips.

“What was that about ‘not getting between John and I’, Doctor McKay,” she said to herself, but she could not bring herself to take offense. She had never seen John smile like that - as if he really meant it, as if he could not help himself. Of course it would have been preferable if she did not have to find out about it in quite such a direct way, but well… she was glad, really.

She wondered if they knew they were getting married at her court eventually or if she would have to plan the whole thing. Oh well, noblesse oblige.

With renewed determination she straightened her lapels and went off to give Nolar a piece of her mind.

 


End file.
